How to raise a kind child....THE HARVARD WAY
Like most guardians, you presumably have a few beliefs for bringing up your children. You need them to be smart, effective, upbeat, kind successful, happy, kind—however which values would you say you are really showing as important?
Worried that "our youth’s values appear to be awry," analysts from Harvard chose to handle this inquiry. As part of the Making Caring Common venture, analysts met 10,000 US center and high schoolers in the between of 2013 and 2014. What's more, 80 percent of those children revealed their folks showed them that personal happiness and high achievement were more important than caring for others.
Past studies found that 96 percent of parents say that creating ethics and morals in their children is "important, if not essential." But rather this new investigation indicates kids aren't getting it. While 19% did view caring as their parents' top priority, 54% said accomplishment was more important to their parents, and 27% revealed happiness was generally vital.
- Practice makes perfect
Kids require chances and opportunities to work on getting to become caring and helpful; those characteristics aren't really innate. Researchers recommend for daily repetition, "whether it's helping a friend with homework, pitching in around the house, having a classroom job, or working on a project on homelessness." Guidance from adult is vital.
- Kids need to learn to "zoom in and out"
Researchers clarify as this implies kids should be tuned in to the need of those in their immediate circle, yet additionally have a greater perspective. "It is by zooming out and taking multiple perspectives, including the perspectives of those who are too often invisible (such as the new kid in class, someone who doesn’t speak their language, or the school custodian), that young people expand their circle of concern and become able to consider the justice of their communities and society" the study says.
- Strong moral role models are key
Simply put, this implies guardians need to practice what they preach. Perfection isn't the appropriate response; acknowledging mistakes is. "We, too, need to continually practice and zoom in and out, cultivating our capacities for care, widening our circles of concern, and deepening our understanding of fairness and justice" researchers write.
- Children need to be guided in managing destructive feelings
Kids struggle to care for others when overwhelmed by feelings like anger or envy. Adults can help them manage these feelings in productive and beneficial ways.
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